I don't know why (well I guess I really do) but I am in a terrible, mean mood. Everything is boring to me and I want no part of anything. I am so angry, antsy, crazy all at the same time. I try to find some joy in things but I can't. I am feeling rather empty. I am annoyed with myself, so if reading this annoys you too, I understand. Working, eating, getting out of bed, going to the store, grocery shopping, these are all unimaginable tasks to me.The only reason I eat is for Pumpkin. Everything actually is stupid to me and tastes horrible. Have I fallen worse into a depression? I don't want to cry but I do want to scream at everybody.
I just really want to be left alone by all these real life people. They anger me to no extent right now. I don't mind my internet friends, in fact I like them better. I would really just like to check out for a bit. I am afraid Pumpkin is dead or sick. There is no real reason for this but I feel like he is. This feeling of emptiness is terribly strong. I don't know what to do. Anxiety has overcome me and once again I am drowning.